He will not be home at 10pm.
As the July 27, 2010 release of Starcraft II sneaks ever closer, the frenzied yowls of Korean nationals can be heard climbing ever-higher in pitch, reaching beyond their stately borders out into the Pacific Ocean – a sonic nerd-cannon aimed squarely at Blizzard’s California headquarters.
Blizzard has been good to the Koreans – they’re releasing not one but two versions of Starcraft II in the country, one “all ages” version, and an “adult” version with the original, standards-board disapproved content, and they’re also giving Korean fans access to a second, open Beta that’s going take place after the game is released.
But that’s not all, folks. Even though it will result in net short term losses, Blizz is also giving any Korean players currently playing WoW free access to Starcraft II online.
Oh, and they’re only releasing Starcraft II in Korea as an “online pass”. It will cost 69,000 won ($58) for unlimited play, 9,900 won for 30 days, and a one-day pass will run a measly (but not cost-effective) 2,000 won.
Blizzard knows who loves them, and they’re doing what they can to return that love. Of the 9.5 million copies sold of the original Starcraft, almost half (4.5 million) were sold in Korea alone. Take that, rest of the free world!
Korea loves gaming. Not in a sweet, “buy you a teddy bear at Valentine’s day” kind of way, but with a hot and fierce “I’ll kill us both if you leave” kind of creep-stalker love. Stories abound about the massive amounts of gaming done in the country, and the most recent media attention was garnered by a couple who left their physical baby to starve to death while they raised a virtual one in Internet cafes.
Seriously, just pick up the bassinet and take it with you. Or steal a computer. This really isn’t that hard.
In response to such incidents, along with the “I killed my friend over a virtual [sword/set of chainmail/online girlfriend (who was actually a dude, BTW)]” type, the Korean Culture Ministry has once again decided to stick their hands in the online pot.
Since April of this year, the Ministry has been hard at working finding ways to limit the amount of time gamers can spend online with their favorite unreal friends. Currently touted solutions include imposing a “gaming curfew” for school-age children between midnight and 8am, as well as throttling back Internet connections the longer gamers are online, making their games run more slowly and their anger burn more brightly.
The Ministry is relying on gaming companies to help implement their solutions, which are supposed to go into effect later on in the year. In a country with abundant and sophisticated Internet access, kids are simply going to go underground, but at least on the face of things the situation is going to look better. Gaming companies are not shy about helping out either – after the recent changes to both Starcraft II’s gameplay and to the Battle.net regulations, the Korean government has shown that it has teeth when it comes to nipping at the heels of trouble spots in their Internet paradise, and companies would be wise to comply with their requests if they want their game to be sold or played anywhere in the country.
But no matter the regulations imposed on the Korean people, or the waves of betting scandals that have rocked the e-sports community, Starcraft II is going to cause a massive consumption of power, bandwidth and over-large energy drinks when July 27th finally arrives.
This means that after absurdly long gaming sessions, unfettered by the as-yet-unreleased curfew and throttle-down Internet regs, our intrepid Koreans are going to pee all they can pee.
An army joke? At the end of a Marines-themed post?
Our ridiculousness occurs with an almost military precision.
